Tintumon -Ooty

Tintumon friend nodu

Tintu:ente jeevithathinu santhoshavum samadhanavum kittiyath ooty mukhanthiramanu

Friend:ni ooty yil poyittundo?

Tintu:njanithuvare poyittilla pakshe ente “WIFE” ootyilanu

Tintumon - Kuda mattam

Keeriya kudayumayi pokunnna tintumonodu achan: Engotada ee keeriya kudayumayi?

Tintumon : Thrisur poorathinu pova …avide kuda maatamund…
Maarikitumonu Nokkatte

Tintumon - LKG ROWDISM

Dundumon- ” aliya ninte penninu UKG-yile oruthan rubber koduthu…

Tintumon- ” edhada avante section..?

dundumon- ” UKG- C, pedikkanda aliya,avide nammude pillerund..

Tintumon- ” boost babuvinodum cerilac tutuvinodum peekiri sasiyodum avane sketch cheyan para…ennitu vaigunneram avante pencilum rubberum odichu kalanjekku,kurachu neram avide kidannu karayatte,ente penninu rubber koduthavan ini ezhudharudh…

Reality Show

Reality showyude audition nadakkunnu. Pankedukkanethiya oru kuttiyodu judge: Kuttikku padanariyamo?
Kutti: Illa
Judge: Dance ariyamo?
Kutti: Illa
Judge: Pinnenthina ingottu vannathu?
Kutti: Elimination roundel njan bhangiyayi karanjolam saar.

T-Shirt Quotes and Sayings

I’m the person your mother warned you about.

I’m not as dumb as you look.

No sense in being pessimistic It wouldn’t work anyway.

We should forgive our enemies, but only after they’ve been taken out and shot.

Never kick a man unless he’s down.

There is intelligent life on Earth, but I’m just visiting.

Work is the curse of the drinking class.

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’ve got it made.

How can I love you if you won’t lie down ?

I wear the brains in the family.

There’s no future in time travel.

Put on your seat belt… I wanna try something.

Beat the 5 o’clock rush – Leave work at noon.

I’m not unemployed, I’m a consultant

I’m sorry My fault I forgot you were an idiot.

I don’t have a license to kill. I have a learner’s permit.

Where there’s a will… I want to be in it.

All men are idiots And I married their king.

Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.

My Dog Can Lick Anyone.

Out of my mind… Back in five minutes.

People like you are the reason people like me need medication.

There’s too much blood in my alcohol system.

Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.

A day without sunshine is like night.

Excuse, but do I look like someone who cares?

Do not disturb I’m disturbed enough already.

The trouble with life is there’s no background music.

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?

I’m sorry My fault I forgot you were an idiot.

Always remember you’re unique… Just like everyone else.

I don’t have a license to kill. I have a learner’s permit.

If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.

All men are idiots And I married their king.

In America Anyone Can Be President That’s One of the Risks You Take.

Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.

No sense in being pessimistic It wouldn’t work anyway!

Stop repeat offenders. Don’t re-elect them!

I wear the brains in the family.

BEER It’s not just for breakfast anymore.

Out of my mind… Back in five minutes.

There’s too much blood in my alcohol system.

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS–But it uses up a thousand times the memory.

Punctuality is the virtue of the bored.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.

It’s hard to be funny when you have to be clean.

Whatever the questions is, Liquor Is The Answer

Your Boyfriend Thinks I’m Hot.

Weapons Of Mass Distraction.

This is my drinking shirt.

I can resist everything except temptation.

Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.

Excuse, but do I look like someone who cares?

Do not disturb I’m disturbed enough already.

I don’t know what makes you dumb But it really works.

Where there’s a will… I want to be in it.

Us blondes aren’t dumb.

Wasted All The Time.

Life’s Too Short To Date Ugly Women.

Blonde and proud of it.

Don’t Annoy The Crazy Person.

Don’t make me call out my Flying Monkeys.

I’m with Stupid.

I don’t need no Educashun.

Tintumon - Heaven

A priest was talking to a group of kids about “being good” and going to heaven. At the end of his talk, he asked, “Where do you want to go?”

“Heaven! Heaven!” Yelled Tintumol..

“And what do you have to be to get there?” asked the priest.

“Dead!” Yelled Tintumon.

Tintumon - weight check

a girl checks her weight- 58 kg
she removed chappals- 56 kg
then bag- 53 kg
then shall- 52 kg

but coin theernu.
tintumon in Q behind her- :
” you carry on coin njan idam ”

Tintumon - THENGA

vikari tintumonodu: Ichayante parambil ninnum thenga moshtichathu nallathano tintu………?

tintumon: Ariyilla! Ithuvare pottichu nokkiyillacho…..!

Tintumon - marana veedu

marana veetil ninnu madangumbol
Tintumol:”ini enna kaanuka”
Tintumon: “ivide ini aarenkilum marikkumbol kanaam”

Tintumon Vs Judge

Judge: Ninne nale ravile 5 manik thookkikollum.
Tintumon: HA HA HA HA..
Judge: Nee enthinanu Chirikkunnad?
Tintumon: athinu njan ezhunnelkkumbol thanne 8 maniyaavum..

Urumbum aanayum hide and seek

Urumbum aanayum hide and seek kalikkayirunnu...appo urumbu ambalathil olichu.... aanakku enganey manassilaayi urumbu amabalathil olichennu?
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chinthikkooo.
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Aana urumbintey cheruppu purathu kandu....

Tintumon - Surprise

Tintumonte daddy US il ninum vanu.

Dady: amma evide?

Tintumon :amma marichit 5 masamayi.

Dady :enitentha enod parayanje?

Tintumon :Oru surprise aayikotennu vicharichu!

Tintumon - Father’s name

teacher- ” what is your father’s name ?

dundu mon- ” T.V Krishnan”

gundumol- ” A.C Abraham”

tintumon – ” Fridge Sasi…. ini njanayittu kurakkunnilla….

Tintumon - Leave

TintumonTeacharodu: muthashi marichu leave venam”

Teacher :ninte muthassiyalle 1 masam munpu marichathu?

Tintumon:”muthachan veendum ketti”

Tintumon - Vettakaran

Tintumon:ente appuppan valya vetakarana,kazhinja azhcha 3 puliye pidikkan poyi.

frnd:enitu pidicho?

Tintumon:evide, puliyude vishapum mari apupante kadiyum mari..

Tintumon - Smoking

Teacher: Translate the following into english.

Ivide Pugavli Padilla

Tintumon: Smoking does not sing here!

Tintumon - Sookshichal dukhikenda

Tintu mon: Sookshichal dukhikkenda ennu parayunathu verutheya.

Dundu mol: Athentha??

Tintu mon: 100gm kanjavu sookshichathinu ammavane police innale arrest cheythu..

Tintumon Vs Ambani

Ambani: Ente caril ravile purapetta rathri ayalum ente estatinte pakuthi polum kandu kazhiyilla!!!

Tintumon: Ente appoopanum ethu pole oru car undayirunnu…..

Tintumon at Hospital

Doctor: “Nee entha divasavum ravile clinicinte veliyil vannu ladies-ne vayilnokki nilkunnathu?”

Tintumon: “Sir purathu board vachirikkunnathu kandille…Sthreekale nokkanulla samayam 9 am to 12 pm ennu!!!!”

Tintumon - 64 pallukal

Tintumon to dundu in anger:”ninte 64 pallukalum njan adichu thazheyidum…!!!”

Ithu ketta pintu: “64 pallukalo..?athengane oralinu ake 32 pallukalalle ulloo?”

Tintumon: “enikkariyamayirunnu ithil nee keri ida pedum ennu…athu kondu ninte pallukalum chertha njan enniyathu…!!!!”

Tintumon - Hard to get

Dundumon: I want divorce. My wife hasn’t spoken to me in six months.

Tintumon: Think about it once again. Wifes like that are hard to get!

Tintumon - Late

tintumon was late , and when he reached school at 9.30, the teacher yelled, “You should’ve been here at 9:00!”

tintumon: “Why? What happened at 9:00?”

Makalude Kalyanathinu Panthal Idana

Urumbu aanayodu: "Ninte Shorts eniku oru divasatheku tharumo?"

Aana:"Eanthina?"

Urumbu: "Makalude Kalyanathinu Panthal Idana!!!"

Muttuvin Thurakkapedum

Sir:Muttuvin thuraka pedum ennu Yeshu parayuvan karanam

Tintumon:Annu Calling bell illayirunnu sir!!!

URUMB falls in love

URUMB falls in love with AANA & they married.Next day AANA died.Appol URUMB:Oh,1divasathe luv,Athinu 1janmam muzhuvan kuzhi vettanam

Tintumon on wedding

After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?”

“Sixteen,” Tintumon responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly.

“How do you know that?”

“Easy,” Tintumon replied .

“All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said, 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.”

Tintumon - Complete and Finish

Dundumon: What is the difference between “complete and finish”?

Tintumon: When you marry a right girl you are complete and when you marry the wrong one you are finished !!!!!

Tintumon - Love and Diet

Tintumol Tintumonodu- ” stop looking at the girls, you are committed now. you are my lover”

Tintumon- ” oh honey, this is not fair.
u mean if i am on diet i should not even look at menu.

Tintumon - Multiply

Teacher: “How stupid you are? You can not multiply 88 by 25? can’t you see that DUNDU can do it in less than no time?”

Tintumon: “I should not be surprised. They say that fools are multiplying rapidly these days..!!!”

Tintumon - Promise

Teacher: Didn’t you promise to behave?

Tintumon: Yes, Sir.

Teacher: And didn’t I promise to punish you if you didn’t?

Tintumon: Yes, Sir, but since I broke my promise, I don’t expect you to keep yours.

Tintumon - Press

Tintumon calls press to print death of his grandpa

Clerk: Rs 50/ word

Tintumon: Grandpa dead

Clerk: Sorry min 5 words

Tintumon: Grandpa dead, wheel chair for sale!!